Happy Columbus Day!

On the second Monday of October we celebrate Christopher Columbus (and by celebrate, I mean we buy mattresses 60% off). However, the more I learn about Chris Columbus, the less I think there is to celebrate.

Does this depiction of Columbus look like a combination of Christopher Walken and James Spader, or is it just me?

For one thing, Christopher Columbus did not prove the that the earth wasn’t flat. The educated people of Columbus’ age believed that the earth was round. In fact, brilliant minds such as Pythagoras, Aristotle, and Euclid wrote about the earth as a sphere way before Columbus came along.

In addition, Christopher Columbus cannot be credited with discovering America because (1) Columbus never sailed to America, he sailed to the Caribbeans, (2) the Americas and the Caribbean were already populated, and (3) there is evidence that Leif Erikson explored Canada centuries before Columbus.

Finally, Columbus subjugated and slaughtered the indigenous people of the islands.

So what are we celebrating on Columbus Day? We’re celebrating a man who did not discover America, did not prove the Earth was round, and was not a nice guy. We’re celebrating a man who is, quite frankly, overrated.

I’m much more excited for Leif Erikson Day.

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